The holidays are here! Which for some families means traveling! If you are traveling for the holidays with a baby for the first time, naturally travel and sleep is on your mind… 

There is absolutely lots to think about that can be anxiety provoking: how will they nap? Will they even nap (or sleep overnight)? Will they get too overtired or overstimulated? Can I ensure we will have a safe sleep arrangement wherever we go? How do we navigate crossing time-zones? Will they sleep on the flight? All the unknown is so much to process it is perfectly natural to feel some stress. 

Traveling with little ones in general is a lot. There are lots of things to pack, feeding considerations (especially bottle-fed babes), and of course, sleep arrangements to plan. I know from chatting with many of you this year that figuring out your travel and sleep plans is stressful, so I decided to write this blog post to hopefully ease many of your concerns as you travel this holiday season!

My hope is that after reading this blog post you have lots of strategies you can implement while traveling to help you feel at ease. As I always say when it comes to baby sleep: focus on what you can control, and let go of the rest. There is so much we can’t control when it comes to travel and sleep but there are absolutely things we can do to set our babies (and ourselves) up for success. In this post, I’ll share my top tips for how to set-up a safe sleep space in a variety of scenarios, managing naps while traveling,  crossing time zones and jet lag. And lastly, we’ll chat about getting in the right mindset for your trip so you can make the MOST memories possible while away with your little one.

AND for the first time ever, some mamas that I have supported this year have contributed some travel and sleep advice for you! I reached out to three Intuitive Baby Sleep mamas who have done some long distance travel this year with their little ones. Their quotes are pure GOLD and will hopefully put many of your concerns at ease! Big thanks to Sammy (mama to E), Oriana (mama to P) and S (mama to W) for sharing their experience for this blog. 

Safe sleep 

First things first, let’s chat setting up a safe sleep environment at your destination, as this can take some planning in advance. For safety, it is recommended that you use the similar sleeping arrangement as you do at home. (source: Safe Infant Sleep, Professor James McKenna) If you bedshare, it is not recommended to put the infant on a separate sleeping surface, such as a pack-and-play, bassinet or crib, unless bedsharing cannot be done safely in this new environment. Similarly, if you do not routinely bedshare at home, it is not recommended to do so while traveling. If your baby sleeps in a crib or bassinet at home, then you will want to ensure your baby sleeps on their own surface when away. Of course, many parents do a mix of bedsharing and crib/independent sleep at home. If this is you, then you absolutely can plan to do a mix of both while away. 

How to bedshare while away

Bedsharing while away can be tricky to plan for in advance, but not totally impossible. Ensuring you are following all safe sleep guidelines (linked here) can be challenging as there will be things outside of your control. Mattress firmness is a big one. If you are staying with family or friends you can have them test the mattress firmness in advance so you know whether the mattress is safe. Cosleepy has a free mattress firmness test linked below. All you need is a ruler, paperback books and two full one-litre cartons of milk or juice to test the firmness. Ask if the mattress can be placed directly on the floor. If not, consider using a mesh bed rail while bedsharing, just be sure to pack the gaps (again,@cosleepy is your girl for resources on packing gaps.) Be sure the sheet is tight fitting, and all other risk factors can easily be mitigated. If you plan to consume alcohol, smoke, take sleeping pills to help with jet lag or any substance that impairs your ability to respond to your baby while on vacation, it is not safe to bedshare with your baby. Be sure to plan for separate surface cosleeping, and perhaps practice in advance of your trip if you are currently bedsharing exclusively.

Follow the same guidelines above for bedsharing in a hotel, just know there is a risk you will arrive and your mattress may not be firm enough. If that is the case, the post linked here from cosleepy has some great suggestions! 

Separate Surface Cosleeping

If you are not able to bedshare safely while away, or your little one is used to sleeping in their own environment, you will want to set up a separate sleep surface. A pack-and-play or travel crib is a great alternative. To ease the transition to a new space during naps and at night, try to set the sleep space up as close to their sleep space at home as possible. Bring unwashed sheets and sleep sacks that smell like home. If the baby has a noise machine or certain music, bring that along. If you use blackout curtains, perhaps consider buying a travel blackout curtain. The closer the sleep space is to what the baby is used to, the more likely it is that naps will happen as they do at home.

Prior to your trip give your baby lots of time to play and explore their travel crib at home. The more familiar and comfortable baby is in their travel crib the easier the transition to sleep in the crib will be on your trip. Also, if you can take a few naps or nights leading up to your trip this can go a long way in getting baby good and comfortable in their space. Some babies love their pack and play while away, and others do not. Sammy, mama to E and S, mama to W both had different approaches to using the pack-and-play for naps while away:

“For hotel travel, we usually use a pack-and-play, even when we knew she won’t last long in it because it still gives us that few hours while we were awake that we didn’t need to be with her.” – S, mama to W

“Independent naps in her playpen during the day did not happen. Our trip involved lots of driving and activity so E had lots of naps on the go. This included plenty of car naps and we always took our ergobaby carrier with us which she sleeps well in. She also sometimes slept in the stroller but this was rarer. If we were sticking around our airbnb then she typically had contact naps and we just leaned into that.” – Sammy, mama to E

Just remember that even if you set up an almost identical sleep space as home and have done practice in the sleep space before travel sleep may still be a bit off at first since baby is in a new environment. So no need to worry if you don’t have time to practice before the trip or you plan to rent or borrow your sleep space while away. As S, mama to W shared: “You can fly with a pack and play, but we have borrowed or rented other sleep gear we’ve needed. When W was three months old we borrowed a bassinet from friends. Had there been a similar bassinet as the one we had at home available to rent I would have strongly considered it. It definitely impacted her, and therefore, my sleep.”

Sleep while flying 

Travel and sleep on a plane is another natural source of concern. Will they sleep well? Will they sleep at all? Will they get so overtired and be disruptive to other passengers? Will our trip start off on the wrong foot? With so much uncertainty (and so much out of your control) it makes perfect sense to feel a bit worried. 

Whenever I face moments of uncertainty (or whenever the parents I support do) I always bring the focus to the things I can control, and let go of the rest. For sleep on the plane, there are lots of little things we can do to support our little one’s sleep. But there is also a lot of letting go. It truly is a balance (so make sure you see the final section on this blog for mindset while traveling with little ones.)

Things you can do to support sleep on the plane

An obvious one – plan for contact naps. It may take some extra support for your little one to fall asleep (especially with all the distractions on a plane) but offering lots of connection, support and contact can be so helpful. Bring a carrier and walk the aisles, nurse or feed to sleep, snuggle and sing. Stroking between the eyebrows can be really soothing and encourage their eyes to close. If you have a regular contact napper you truly can lean into the routine you do at home and just expect it may take a bit longer than usual. Feel free to also layer in some new sleep associations leading up to your trip that are easy to do on the plane. Singing or shushing, bum patting and rubbing their back are great sleep associations that can be done anywhere.

“W has been a big contact napper all along. I think that was a really big advantage for plane travel. Having her sleep is very much the best way to pass the hours on a plane. As she has gotten older it’s a bit harder for her to sleep on the plane but with nursing and timing we managed to get good naps in.”

Dress your baby lightly and comfortably and pack layers if it gets cool. If they will be contact napping they will draw a lot of heat from your body, so having them dressed lightly with the ability to add a blanket will keep them from getting overheated (or sweaty which may leave them cool when they wake).

If your little one loves to sleep in their car seat, buying them their own seat on the plane and bringing along their car seat is another great alternative (and the safest way for them to travel.) It also is a safe place to put your baby to sleep if you are at risk of falling asleep while holding your baby. If it is a long flight, a redeye or you’re traveling solo without an extra set of hands to take turns holding the baby, bringing your car seat is an absolute must. It can also be super helpful if you have a really distractible little one. As mama Sammy shared: “The car seat also allowed us to pull the canopy and cover the seat with a blanket to make it a little darker and also block her view (she was so distractible by what was going on around her and the well meaning passengers behind us that kept waving and cooing at her … this made it impossible for her to truly relax and fall asleep even though she was on her way there…so the blanket definitely helped!)” 

Remember that all you can do is offer opportunities to sleep, try to follow their typical routines, snuggle and support them to sleep in ways that are semi-familiar, and then let go of the rest. Even if you follow their routine perfectly, they still may not sleep well on the plane, and this is ok. Sammy, mama to E put it perfectly: “I was so nervous about her crying on the plane and bothering other passengers. I was reminded that babies deserve to travel and exist in public spaces just as everyone else! Babies cry and that’s ok!” – Sammy, mama to E

Dealing with time zones and jet lag

Crossing time zones with a baby can feel really overwhelming; we know ourselves how off our sleep can feel when we’re jet lagged, so of course we worry about how it’ll impact our baby’s sleep. It will hopefully be comforting to know that it typically it takes adults about one day for every hour of time difference, and many babies adjust faster than adults. Babies under six months do not have a fully established circadian rhythm, which in many cases can make this transition easier than an older baby or toddler. It can be a bit harder for older babies with a regular temperament who wake and sleep around the same time every day as they will have a harder time shifting to the new time.

Depending on how long you will be gone for and how many time zones you are crossing you may want to keep baby on their same schedule. If you’re away for less than a week or crossing less than three time zones you may want to simply keep baby on their typical time and follow their general rhythms and flows for their day. 

If you decide to shift baby to the new time (or are forced to as you are crossing many time zones) there are a few things you can do to help baby adjust. First, you can use sunlight to your advantage. Natural lights works wonders on resetting our circadian rhythms! On your first full day, wake baby in the morning around their wake up time at home and expose them to sunlight within an hour of rising. Then follow their general rhythm for the rest of their day. Lean into their sleepy cues, follow their lead, and go through your bedtime routine as closely as possible to what you do at home. 

“She did amazing crossing time zones. The first day she was sleepy, but she adjusted instantly because we tried to keep following her routine, had lots of sunlight and following her cues.” – Oriana, mama to P

Be patient as you make this change, and know that if your first few nights are tough baby will likely adjust soon enough. 

Mindset

I truly believe the most helpful travel and sleep “tip” I can give you is to expect that sleep will not go according to plan, and also trust that it will be ok. Yes, there could be sleep disruption, but it will not be the end of the world. Remind yourself “I can cope with this” and “they cannot stay awake forever” during hard moments. And often, we are prepared for things to be a bit disrupted (or maybe even for it to be super challenging) we are usually pleasantly surprised by how things turn out.

Lean into their cues, prepare for lots of contact and on the go naps (and see successful independent naps as a BONUS) and let them catch up on sleep when they can. Take an “anything goes” mindset.  Things may get super off course, but I promise you, they will eventually get back on track.

“Lean in to letting “rules” go out the window! Traveling is stressful so do whatever you need to make it easier for you and your little one(s). If this means screen time and letting them have a soother all day long – go for it, your sanity will thank you!” – Sammy, mama to E

Travel and sleep doesn’t have to be stressful. You really can have a few strategies in mind, then trust that things will go ok. My hope for you is that you can truly let go of all the things you cannot control, focus on what you can, and make some truly amazing memories on your vacation as possible. This last quote from Oriana, mama to P, sums it up beautifully… when I asked her what she would do differently on her trip in terms of travel and sleep, her response was: “Nothing! I enjoyed not stressing about sleep while away.” – Oriana, mama to P

As 2022 ends and the new year begins, you may be thinking about New Year’s resolutions. Last year, as a first-time mom on maternity leave, I didn’t make one. I didn’t want to add anything extra to my plate. Looking back on this past year, my first full year of motherhood, I’ve learned so many things. I made some very simple changes in how I approach morherhood that have improved my overall well-being. As I was reflecting on 2022 the other day, I thought these would make great New Years’ resolutions for new moms (or anyone, really.) 

So today, I am sharing with you three simple New Years’ resolutions for moms: redefine self-care, spend more time outside and tune out the noise.

Spend more time outside

One great New Years’ resolution for moms (that will improve sleep for you and your little one) is to spend more time outside. This is my New Year’s resolution for 2023. Although we spend quite a bit of time outdoors already, I feel we could be better at getting outside in the winter months. 

Benefits of Being Outside

There are so many benefits to spending time outdoors. When you spend time outside, your immune system, digestion and metabolism improve. There are health benefits to vitamin D exposure. Being outside improves your mood, and studies show that stress levels go down within minutes. 

Regular time outdoors also helps establish our circadian rhythm, our internal biological clock, which is crucial for a good night’s sleep, especially for babies. Babies are born with an undeveloped circadian rhythm. It takes anywhere from 2-6 months to develop fully. Exposure to natural sunlight during the day (especially in the early morning hours or just before sunset) and darkness at night help establish the circadian rhythm.

I notice a huge difference in how O and I sleep when we have regular time outdoors. Getting outside within a few hours of waking each morning helps tremendously and is also one of my favourite ways to start the day. It is also one of the ways I get back into routine when sleep is distrusted (and I’ll definitely be incorporating more outdoor time to get back into a routine next week after the holidays.) 

One of the best things about getting outside is that it doesn’t have to be complicated. Nor does it have to be for long periods. Even a few minutes can make a difference.

How O and I Spend Time Outside

In the spring, summer and fall, I often sit out on my deck with a coffee first thing in the morning while O plays outside. When she was younger, she would sit on a blanket and watch nature. Now that she’s older, I sometimes bring toys out for her, but we often sit and watch the sunrise together, taking in all that surrounds us. We later wander over to her swing for a bit or go for a walk. We sometimes venture to the park, but more often than not, we explore our backyard.

In the winter, it’s a bit trickier for sure. And we don’t get out first thing anymore since it’s dark. We live in Atlantic Canada and get some harsh winter weather that makes it hard to get out with little ones. 

After feeling too cooped up last winter, I’ve invested in good winter gear for O (I highly recommend merino wool base layers) in hopes that we get out more this year. We have an excellent stroller liner and a baby-wearing winter jacket (linked it here because it’s amazing), so there is no reason not to get out unless it is frigid. 

Getting outside is one of the best things you can do for your overall health and well-being, and you and your little ones sleep. Even a few minutes can make a difference and can easily be done without investing in a ton of gear (unless you love it like we do and WANT to spend more time outside) which makes it a simple, realistic New Years’ resolution for moms.

Redefine self-care

In 2022, I listened to an audiobook, “The Highly Sensitive Parent” by Elaine Aron and a podcast by Taylor Kulik (both linked below) that changed my perspective of self-care. When you think about it, self-care just means taking care of yourself. Most “self-care for moms” centers around luxurious things (pedicures and yoga classes) or escaping from your children for dates and girl’s nights. And while I know those things are also important, they aren’t things we can do every day. We should all be taking care of ourselves daily, which for most of us means finding pockets of time for ourselves when our kids are around. 

“The Highly Sensitive Parent” by Elaine Aron (audiobook) – click here

“How Mothers Can Meet Their Needs While Being Responsive + Practicing Self Care” – Taylor Kulik (podcast)

This realization led to a significant perspective shift for me. I began to find small ways to recharge throughout the day, every day, instead of waiting for a block of time to myself. 

I define self-care as doing something daily that brings me joy, refills my cup and improves my well-being.

What Self-Care Looks Like For Me

For me, journaling, getting outdoors, moving my body, and showering are all things I do to look after myself. I find joy in the simple things, like a sunrise or a sip of coffee, daily. I also view booking appointments with my chiropractor or therapist as ways I practice self-care as a mom. 

And, of course, I look forward to time alone. I also look forward to treating myself to new things (I’m the first to admit I did a bit of Boxing Day shopping for myself). And I love a good date night with my husband. But I no longer see these things as the only way to get a break to recharge. 

What I love about this definition is self care really can be anything! And it will look different for everyone. The examples above are how I practice self-care; your list probably looks very different. Some great places to start are eating nourishing meals (I’ve added “The Postnatal Depletion Cure” by Oscar Serrallach to my 2023 to-read list) or looking after your mental health, or practicing good sleep hygiene. 

The important thing to remember with self-care is that your needs matter too. And you should take care of yourself every day. We give so much of ourselves to our children (as we should), but it’s impossible to give from an empty cup. But refilling our cup doesn’t have to be complicated or away from our babies. 

So I invite you to take the pressure off making self-care a grand event in 2023 and start looking at it as the little things you do each day for your well-being. Something as small as a simple perspective change is a fantastic New Years’ Resolution for moms.

Tune out the noise

The last thing I did last year that I think would be an excellent New Years’ resolution for moms is tune out the noise (i.e. everyone else’s opinion.) I genuinely believe that when we let go of society’s unrealistic expectations of baby sleep, follow our child’s unique cues, rhythms and sleep needs and trust our intuition, we stress less about sleep. I learned this early on (which you can read about here), but where I struggled for a long time was tuning out everyone else’s opinion. 

If you’re a mom I am sure you have got been asked if your baby was sleeping through the night before. If you’re a mom-to-be, brace yourself, this question is going to come at you earlier than you expect. I was asked if my daughter was sleeping through the night for the first time when she was three weeks old. Of course, she wasn’t. And guess what, she still doesn’t (which is also normal.)

At three weeks old, I could laugh off that question because it seemed ridiculous that she should be sleeping through at that age. But once she was a bit older and this question was followed with (well-intentioned) advice on how to get her to sleep through, I was bothered.

I felt like I was being judged as a parent. How O slept was a reflection of how “good of a mom” I was. And when I began being upfront about bedsharing, or our plans to nurse beyond infancy, I was sometimes met with strange looks or questions about when I’d stop those things. 

It has taken a lot of work on my end (and some therapy), but I am now in a place where I feel confident in my parenting choices. It has allowed me to ignore advice that doesn’t align with my values and tune out any judgment on the choices I make. 

It’s incredibly freeing. And it’s my wish for every single mom in this community. 

I hope, at the very least, the last resolution is something you can take with you into 2023. 

Which of these resolutions are you going to make for 2023? Let me know in the comments below. 

‘Tis the season for gatherings with loved ones, holiday parties and making memories with your family! It’s a magical time of year, and many of us have traditions we look forward to sharing with our little ones this year. As much as you’re looking forward to the season, you may wonder how to navigate naps during the holidays. You may be feeling a bit anxious about being out and about during nap time. Whether it’s your baby’s first Christmas or you’re navigating nap time during the holidays for the second or third year, I have you covered with practical tips to get you through nap time, AND that will allow you to take in (and enjoy) all the festivities this season. 

Tip #1: Realistic expectations

First and foremost, it is so important to have realistic expectations for naps during the holidays. Whether you have just a few events to go to, travelling across the country to stay for the holidays, or anywhere in between, your baby’s typical rhythm will be disrupted. And that’s OK (repeat that with me.) Is every nap going to go as planned? Probably not. Will bedtime be later than usual? It could be, or it could be earlier to make up for out-of-routine naps. Will baby become overstimulated, overtired and have a harder time falling (and staying) asleep? It is quite possible.

There really is no way to guarantee that these things won’t happen, but if you’re feeling stressed, your baby is going to pick up on your energy which will more often than not lead to more disrupted sleep.

The important thing to remember is that a bit of disrupted sleep and routine over the holidays is not the end of the world. Your baby will fall back into routine shortly after the season is over. Stressing about these things is only going to rob your joy. Setting yourself up mentally for success but accepting and expecting that some sleep disruption is going to happen will help you relax and enjoy the season a whole lot more. 

As I’ll share in tips 2-7, there are many ways you can support naps during the holidays so that the disruption that is likely to happen is minimized as much as possible. 

Tip #2: Naps in the carrier

If you’ve read my blog on why I love contact napping, it is probably no surprise that a carrier nap is my favourite way to manage naps during the holidays. If you have a baby who is a regular contact napper like my daughter O, this will probably be your best bet to get a decent nap while you’re out and about this holiday season. 

Click here to read Why I Love Contact Naps

Carrier (or wrap or ring sling) naps are so soothing to many babies. Motion is very calming for lots of babies. Babies also attach through their senses in the first year, meaning unless they can hear, see, smell or touch their primary attachment figure they are alarmed, which makes the carrier a perfect recipe for naps.  Being hugged snuggly against mom’s body, breathing in her scents and hearing her heartbeat and voice will help baby feel at ease enough to fall asleep. 

For those that nurse to sleep, you can nurse while baby is in the wrap or carrier with certain brands, then adjust the baby into the proper position once the baby is asleep. I used this Beluga Baby Wrap last Christmas and could nurse O to sleep and reposition quite easily. As always, ensure you follow TICKS for safe sleep when baby wearing: Tight, In view at all times, Close enough to kiss, Keep chin off chest, and Supporter back. 

Tip #3: Recreate sleep space as close as possible

If you’re travelling for the holidays or going to be at someone’s house overnight, you will need to set up a sleep space for nighttime. In this case, you may want to consider using this sleep space for naps as well. For safety, it is recommended that you use the same sleeping arrangement as you do at home ( see Safe Infant Sleep by Professor James McKenna for more details.) If you bedshare, it is not recommended to put the infant on a separate sleeping surface, such as a pack-and-play, bassinet or crib, unless bedsharing cannot be done safely in this new environment (click here for safe bedsharing guidelines). 

Similarly, if you do not routinely bedshare at home, it is not recommended to do so while travelling. If your baby sleeps in a crib or bassinet at home, then you will want to ensure your baby sleeps on their own surface when away. 

If you are already setting up a separate sleep surface, this is an excellent choice for a nap if your little one is used to napping independently. To ease the transition to a new space during naps and at night, try to set the sleep space up as close to their sleep space at home as possible. Bring unwashed sheets and sleep sacks that smell like home. If the baby has a noise machine or certain music, bring that along. If you use blackout curtains, perhaps consider buying a travel blackout curtain. The closer the sleep space is to what the baby is used to, the more likely it is that naps will happen as they do at home.

Considerations when travelling

Even if you set up an almost identical sleep space as home and have done practice in the sleep space before travel (see tip 5 below) naps during the holidays may still be a bit off at first since baby is in a new environment. Sleep could be significantly off if you’ve travelled or the baby is jet laggged.

Typically it takes adults about one day for every hour of time difference, although babies can adjust faster than adults. It is also easier to adjust when travelling east versus west since you lose time. Depending on how long you will be gone for and how many time zones you are crossing you may want to keep baby on their same schedule. If you’re away for more than a week or crossing more than three time zones it may make sense to move baby’s schedule. Be patient as you make this change, and know that baby will adjust soon enough. And consider adding in a few of these other tips to get naps in if baby is struggling to nap in their own space.

Tip #4: Naps on the go

Another great option is car naps (or stroller naps of your walking to an event in your neighbourhood). Some babies don’t like the car, or sleeping in the car is hit or miss, so this may be more stress than it’s worth. But if your little one easily falls asleep in the car, this might be your best bet, assuming the timing of events works out reasonably well. You can plan for a car nap on our way to or from gatherings (or between gatherings if you have more than one on the same day.) 

If your baby is a bit older or doesn’t thrive on short naps, plan to take a bit of a longer route or plan what to do when you arrive at the event, and the baby is still sleeping. Remember, it is never safe for a baby to sleep in the car seat once it is no longer clicked into the base. If you have a stroller compatible with your car seat, consider bringing that along to safely transfer the baby from the car once you arrive. If you don’t have this option you’ll unfortunately need to wake baby when you take the car seat out of the car. You can try to “recuse the nap” if you want by using contact, nursing or any other sleep association. But if this doesn’t work (or you don’t want to miss out on visiting) remember that naps are simply used to take the sleep pressure off, accept the short nap, move on and have fun.

Also, it is unsafe for babies to sleep in their car seats for more than two hours, so be sure to wake them up if they’ve been sleeping that long. Plan for breaks along route if you’re driving for more than two hours to give baby car seat breaks. For all things car seat safety, including safe car seat sleep, I love the Instagram account @safeintheseat. 

Tip #5: Plan in advance

Whether you plan to use contact or carrier naps, will be setting up a separate sleep space or are going to aim for naps in the car highly recommend practicing them a few times before the holidays. Especially if these aren’t ways your baby regularly naps. Practicing ahead of time will increase the likelihood that baby will nap in this new way when you’re visiting over the holidays. If you’re bringing a pack-and-play from home that baby will be sleeping in overnight, it may be helpful to practice a few nights in the pack-and-play before you leave.

I also recommend layering in some new sleep associations that you can easily implement no matter where your baby naps. Singing or playing a specific song is a great sleep association, as you can incorporate it into various sleep arrangements. You can easily put on music whether your baby is napping n a carrier, in the car or stroller, or if you’re helping baby fall asleep in a pack and play. Portable white noise machines are another great tool. Feel free to try shushing, bum patting, swaying, or anything else that is easy to implement anywhere. The whole idea is you want something familiar to baby when they are attempting to fall asleep in an unfamiliar environment. 

Tip #6: Plan an escape

And I don’t mean a mad dash out of a party because baby isn’t sleeping (remember, you can do everything “right,”’ and naps may not go according to plan). By “plan an escape,” I mean plan what to do if you notice your baby becoming overstimulated. Babies take in everything. The world is new, and they’re wired to soak it all up and learn. Holiday events are a recipe for overstimulation for a baby with new faces, Christmas lights, and lots of sounds and smells. For some babies, this is not a big deal. For others, especially highly sensitive little ones, it is sensory overload. 

You know your baby best, and if you think there is a chance they may be overwhelmed, plan an escape where the two of you can retreat for some downtime. It doesn’t have to be long, but a short break for a quiet feeding or diaper change in a calm environment can go a long way. Even a quick walk in the fresh air can be a great reset. Follow your baby’s cues, and give them as much quiet and connection with you as they need. If they’ve been passed from relative to relative all evening, a few minutes alone with mom may be exactly what they need to feel safe enough to fall asleep. 

Tip #7: Host an event at your home

My last tip is for those of you who, after reading all this, still feel anxious about taking a baby out over the holidays, or for those mamas with newborns and going out feels daunting. If you host an event at your home, baby will be in their environment, which may be easier to get in naps during the holidays. 

This is also an excellent tip for those with many events spread over a few days. My husband and I live close to both of our families, which is great, but it also means that we juggle multiple visits around the holidays. Last year we did a lot of visiting and gift delivery on December 23rd and knew all of O’s naps were going to be in a carrier or the car on Christmas Day, so we chose to host our family on Christmas Eve to avoid napping on the go three days in a row. This was a great compromise to seeing our families as we always do on Christmas Eve, but it also gave O a day in her own home for some normalcy. A variation of this schedule might be exactly what helps you feel at ease. 

Remember, this season comes once a year, and it is so much fun seeing loved ones. As a parent, one of my greatest joys is seeing the season’s magic through my daughter’s eyes. Please don’t let stressing over naps during the holidays steal any of this magic from you. Focus on what you can control and make as many memories with your baby as possible! 

The holiday season is upon us! I absolutely love this time of year, and it feels extra magical now that we have O. As moms, it is so easy to make this time of year all about our kids, and in general, our needs sometimes get put on the back burner. I have seen many gift guides for babies, toddlers and preschoolers floating around on social media, which inspired this blog. 

In this post, I will share seven gift ideas for the bedsharing mama. I have curated a list of things I think all bedsharing mamas NEED in their life. My list of bedsharing “must haves,” if you will. Nothing in this post is sponsored; it is all simply things I use regularly and have been using since before I started this blog or my sleep certification. 

Pyjamas

First up on my list of bedsharing must-haves is an obvious one: comfortable pyjamas. Even though pyjamas aren’t a revolutionary gift recommendation and could be gifted to anyone (I see you, mama, looking up cute holiday PJs for your baby), there are some special considerations for bedsharing.

Safety considerations

I found finding the perfect bedsharing ensemble a bit challenging when we first started bedsharing with O. You want something that will keep you warm since, for safety, you’re sleeping with fewer blankets and with blankets at waist level (you can check out safe bedsharing guidelines here). Yet you don’t want something too warm (hello, postpartum night sweats). Finding the right fabric is key, which is why I recommend organic cotton or bamboo when shopping for pyjamas, as they are breathable but will keep you warm. Those fabrics can be a bit on the pricey end of things, so if that isn’t feasible (I’m the first to admit I don’t only wear these fabrics to bed), make sure you avoid fleece, which is not breathable and locks in heat, unlike organic cotton or bamboo. I also only wear long sleeves for warmth since I don’t have blankets covering my arms. 

Breastsleeping

The other consideration is how accessible the top is for nursing. Many bedsharing moms choose to breastsleep, a term coined by Professor James McKenna (if you haven’t heard of him, check out my third gift recommendation below). This is how O and I sleep, and I found the best way to do this easily with as little disruption as possible (because less fiddling with my pyjamas means more sleep for me) is with a button-down or open front top and a nursing tank underneath. They make those middle-of-the-night feedings a breeze. So easy, in fact, I only wake up for a minute or two, then drift back off while she nurses. With button-down pyjamas, check your buttons often to make sure they aren’t coming loose, or you can be extra cautious and remove them altogether. Also, be sure your pyjamas don’t have any long strings or ties that could be a strangulation risk. 

There are so many options on the market that meet these criteria in various prints for every mama’s style. You can even get matching sets for mom and baby (or toddler) which would make an extra adorable bedsharing mama gift (and perfect for my last gift recommendation below). 

Sheets

Is there anything better at bedtime than crawling into a bed with fresh sheets? Sheets are another item that can be tricky to find the right fit when bedsharing. The literal fit really matters as you want something quite fitted to the mattress to keep baby safe. The same principles that apply to safe crib sleep apply when bedsharing too.

You also want to consider fabric similar to pyjamas. Organic cotton and bamboo are best for breathability, and make sure you stay away from fleece. Sheet fabric matters a bit extra since baby is sleeping directly on the surface. You want to make sure whatever you choose is smooth and soft, and gentle on baby’s skin. I also wash our sheets in O’s laundry detergent (we love this laundry soap from Hello Bello) to make sure there are no harsh chemicals on her skin while she is sleeping. Although, if you’re reading this because you’re looking for a gift for the bedsharing mama in your life, please do not gift her laundry soap…. Trust me on this one. You could, however, have her new sheets all washed and ready to go after she opens them. That is a gift that she will be extra thankful for. 

Book Recommendation: Safe Infant Sleep by James McKenna

This book is a must-have for all bedsharing or cosleeping parents. It is the baby sleep book I wish I had read before having O. Professor McKenna is the leading expert in safe infant sleep and all things cosleeping and bedsharing. I feel privileged to have learned from him in my sleep certification through Isla Grace sleep. He is a wealth of knowledge, and I genuinely believe all parents would benefit from reading this book.

In this book, Professor McKenna discusses his years of research on mothers and babies sleeping together. He covers safe bedsharing guidelines, as well as separate surface cosleeping (so this book applies to parents using a bassinet or crib in their room too). He also touches on the benefits of cosleeping, breastsleeping, why our babies desire to be close to us, and so much more! I truly cannot recommend this book enough. Click here to check it out on Amazon.ca.

Hooga book light 

Next up is the Hooga book light, which goes perfectly with the Safe Infant Sleep book recommendation. This light was a game-changer for me. I go to bed when O goes to bed most nights (every night for safety reasons before we converted our bed to a floor bed), yet I found I needed a bit of “me time” and time to unwind at the end of the day. Before O was born, I used to read every night before bed, and with this light, I was able to bring that back into my routine and get off my phone before bed. I’ve also used this light to journal before bed, and it’s the perfect light for taking cute pictures of O when she’s fast asleep (please tell me I am not the only parent who does this). 

I love it because it is an amber, blue light-blocking light which won’t disrupt melatonin production (these little sleep hygiene things matter EXTRA when you’re a tired mom getting disrupted sleep.) It is rechargeable, and I find the battery life lasts a really long time. I also love that it has three light settings, so I can get the perfect light depending on how dark it is. I use this nightly before bed and would be lost without it. You can find it on Amazon.ca here.

Bluetooth headphones

Bluetooth headphones are another saving grace when O is sleeping next to me (or on me) and I’m not tired enough to sleep. I use these more for O’s contact naps (read all about why I love contact naps here), but I use them before bed a few nights a week that listen to podcasts or meditation before bed. If you’re heading to bed before you’re ready to fall asleep, Bluetooth headphones can be so helpful for keeping you entertained. 

Gift Card for a Massage

As much as I love bedsharing, one of the downsides is the cuddle curl sleeping position, the recommended sleep position to keep baby safe (see a photo from James McKenna’s book here) can make your body SORE. My hips and lower back, in particular, can get quite tight from sleeping in this position. The few times I’ve treated myself to a massage, I have found it makes a huge difference. Plus, it’s a great way to spend an hour to yourself, enjoying some quiet and relaxation. If massages aren’t your thing, a gift certificate to a chiropractor (I see my chiropractor regularly to keep my bedsharing aches at bay) or a yoga studio are other terrific options to look after your body. 

Photos of mom and baby sleeping

Lastly, and my favourite gift idea of all, ask your partner to take some photos of you and your babe sound asleep together. This is something I recently asked my husband to do, and I think a printed photo would make a lovely, sentimental holiday gift that is also very budget-friendly. These days of sleeping beside our babies will be gone before we know it; all that will be left is the memories made. It’s a chapter I’m sure many of us never want to forget, and what better way to remember than with pictures? 

That wraps up my seven gift ideas for the bedsharing mama! Let me know in the comments which gift idea sparks your interest or any other gift ideas that come to mind!